“What’s a decision you’ve made in the past that you know, logically, was the right decision to make, but which you still feel guilty or regretful about?”
I guess we all feel guilty about some things. And life if full of regrets. But I've been a forward looking person. I tend to 'move on' from things and hope I've taught my children the same things. Earlier in my teaching career, I sometime regretted that I switched my major from pre-med to education but not anymore. I would have been miserable spending all that time in classrooms. I would have missed all the joy working with young people brought me over the years. I made the right decision for having a happy life. It's not easy to decide what you want to do with the rest of your life when you're young.
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| This is what my kids say. |
Visit Michael's blog for the list of others answering this interesting question.
Don't forget IWSG day is this Wednesday. The question for the month, should you care to use it:
When do you know your story is ready?
The George RR Martin Legacy: All men must die.
I read as much as I can. Usually in the hour before I go to bed and sometimes on my stationery bike. My daughter convinced to read some Sarah J. Maas books. She has two series going. I like one better than the other. Both series have one book left. As usual in a series, the penultimate book left the heroes in big trouble, separated and making desperate plans. I'm excited for the last books. But will the heroes die or survive? Will they win or win at a price they didn't want to pay? I've never finished a series by this author, so I don't know how much like 'Martin' she is.
You see the Martin effect in books in ways you didn't used to. In Tolkien's LotR, the heroes survive though they are changed. But read any fantasy today and there's no guarantee who will survive. TV shows have taken the same turn. Not even main characters are safe. Sometimes fans get very upset and vocal, claiming a death was only for to shock or draw a spike of viewers. But the reality, hopefully, is to advance the story.
Do readers and viewers now expect shocking deaths in their fiction? Do you write them into your stories? What TV show shocked you with the death of a character?
What regrets do you have about decisions you made?
27 comments:
You have a good attitude about moving on , sometimes it's easier to think than do.
I enjoyed reading todays post very much.
Yvonne.
There are some things I regret doing but they all came from some really dumb decisions. Mostly, my regrets come from things I didn't do.
I don't want a bunch of characters to die. It's frustrating. Pick a favorite and three chapters later, he's gone.
The only regret I have is that I won't live long enough to read all the books I want to read. I'm not really into all the death and destruction that seems to be so popular now. I gave up after watching a few episodes of Game of Thrones.
I really don't have regrets. Not big ones anyway.
That really is the best childhood memory.
No regrets at my sea. Yeah, sometimes it is just for shock value or an actor is being a douche so they kill them off. But if it fits, all the better.
I have had a few regrets over the years. Logically they made sense at the time, but then later they didn't when I really thought about it. Definitely a live and learn type of thing. I liked the childhood memory. I remember watching commercials and couldn't wait to grow up to buy that cleaning product. What was I thinking?
Betty
I was very bummed when the character George on Grey's Anatomy got hit by a bus and died. Knowing that no character is truly safe adds to the tension and probably does increase viewership. In my first novel, I did kill a main character earlier in the story and in my second, another died near the end. The first was for shock value and to increase the sense of imminent danger. The second was to illicit the emotions of outrage, horror, and loss from the reader.
My only regret is taking out student loans which I'm still paying off! I do see the George R.R. Martin effect. I've seen shows kill off characters just for effect, but others that are shocking yet advance the story. Like in The Walking Dead.
I didn't answer this question of the month because I couldn't think of something I wanted to share. :\
I have killed off a few characters I liked, but it was all for the sake of the story. I never killed off a beloved character or the MC. I could never kill off the MC.
It's awesome that you don't have any major regrets.
On the flip side of that George R.R. Martin thing, with the new serious novel I'm working on now, I wonder if it's a cop out if all of the main characters survive it. Will people be mad that all of them skated out of danger? It's such a fine line, now that killing off main characters is a 'thing'.
I read Stephen King's The Stand way back when I was probably too young to read it, and I remember one of the main characters dying and being so shocked - how could this happen?! You don't kill off a main character! That's when I realized that no one is ever safe in a Stephen King novel. And I love it. :)
There are a few things i regret, but there's not much i can do about any of them.
It would hurt me, i think, to kill off a character, especially if i liked her/him a lot.
I've reached a point in my life where regrets are moot. I know now I did what I did with the best information I had at the time. Second guessing myself does no good now.
Having regrets doesn't change what you've done, but if you learn something that helps in the future then it was an important lesson.
Arlee Bird
Tossing It Out
That's an easy question to answer: All decisions. Always. Forever. Because that's what I'm like.
I think sometimes, the only reason character deaths are shocking is because we don't want them to happen. But if you look at it logically, it's like "Yeah, the character was in a dangerous situation and doing something dangerous...kind of makes sense. Unfortunately."
As I get older, I find it harder to regret decisions that I made years ago - I wouldn't be where I am today if I hadn't made those choices. So no regrets here :).
I don't think there should be an expectation that main characters aren't safe in their own books - it's good every once in a while, but I don't like the 'shock' factor too often. I can't deny that it keeps me reading though...
I like the move on mentality. I think it's healthy.
As for shocking story deaths, I think they are annoying. There have been, maybe, a handful of times where one of these deaths felt necessary or added something to the story. It's like "sex". It used to be that books, film, and TV tried to shock consumers with sex, and sometimes they still do, but now it's all about making everything unpredictable, unstable, and "edgy".
Most of my regrets are things I wouldn't go back and change because changing that would change other things. Better to accept the past and focus on the present and future, imo.
I like to say that my past decisions made me the person that I am now. Are there things that I wish didn't happen? Absolutely. But again, my past shaped who I am today. Thanks for sharing this post!
www.ficklemillennial.wordpress.com
I'm working on a novel now that will have some deaths--if I ever get that far. The Sopranos had some deaths that shocked me. I was also a bit shocked that Tony Soprano didn't die at the end, he just faded away.
Love,
Janie
Looking forward is such a great outlook to have. Regrets tend to fester in my head for years, unfortunately...
As for character deaths, I really enjoy them, both as a writer and reader/viewer. Then again, I'm a lifelong fan of horror, so I'm a little biased, haha.
You're absolutely right, it's hard to make those choices when young. Having the courage to change - that's rarely regretted. Glad you found your calling - although I think you're spreading your word even further now.
After George do we dare become attached to characters? The old promise that the main character never dies is disturbed by multi hero epic. Which characters are safe? None so it seems. Maybe the ones who get killed, and the fans raise the shout "never more" to the author. "You've crossed the line - gone too far into the wilderness. Bring him back!" It's like Nicholas Sparks and romance. It isn't. There is no happily ever after. So if a reader or viewer wants safety for their heroes now where do they go?
Being a forward looking person is so much more healthy than always looking back. Moving on easily is so much better than being stuck. I'm glad that you ultimately didn't regret changing your major. Sounds like you've had a wonderful career.
Michele at Angels Bark
I've been good about not struggling over decisions I've made in the past until recently. Now I have angst over everything and beat myself up way more than I should.
I guess I'm always the most shocked when an important character that I really like on Grey's Anatomy dies or disappears. It's happened so many times, though, you'd think I'd get used to it. But no...
Looking forward, rather than back, is a good rule of life, I think >:)
Cold As Heaven
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